Bring out the best in you

We don’t have to pretend in order
to get a girlfriend or boyfriend!
It’s all about showing the best side
of who you are.

This is the fifth article about finding the one. Make sure you have also read the previous article: 'Going in the same direction' It will give you important tips that might save you from doing crucial mistakes.

First impressions are important! It is smart to behave in a way that makes other people want to get to know you more. 

A couple of years back, an Englishman managed to make a lot of women in Norway fall in love with him and to give him money. In an interview, he said that all he had to do was to smile and to hand out compliments. The guy was no Prince Charming in fact, for want of a better description he was a short, bald-headed fool.

It is sad when dishonest men know more about how to charm women, than the honest guys do and I have seen so many girls fascinated by shallow men, that they turn away the good ones. Likewise, too may guys fall for flirty girls, why is it that the people who are truly worth knowing end up last in the dating queue. The key is to stay true to yourself and learn what it takes to be attractive? You don’t need to succumb to deception to get people to notice you!

1. Smile!

Most people make a better impression when they smile than when they look serious! God has given you the ability to smile for a purpose, so make good use of it! A smile opens doors! If you’re like me and you look serious when you are concentrating, you can practice smiling. Smile! It works! 

2. Listening works better than talking!

Everyone likes attention and if you are truly interested in people, they will open up to you. Likewise, if you are a good listener, people will enjoy your company! It is easy to talk too much, but if you can keep the focus away from yourself and be interested in the other person, you go a long way!

3. Ask the right questions!

Asking good questions is an art everyone can master and open questions work much better than ‘yes’ and ‘no’ questions, for example ‘What’s going on in your life?’ instead of ‘Is life good for you at the moment?’ If you are paying attention to how the person answers, you can follow up with another good question. If they keep the conversation going, you’ve made a breakthrough!

4. Give compliments!

Make use of every opportunity to give honest compliments: “You said that!? Well put!” “That was a nice way to handle it, I must say.” 
“You work that much? You’re really making a good effort!” I have yet to meet a person that didn’t like receiving a compliment. It is hard to find people that do not like being encouraged.

5. Be polite!

Norwegians are not particularly known for their politeness, but most of us like it when people are polite to us and even a feminist will appreciate a man opening the door for her. Letting people go before you, and allowing them to finish their sentences without you interrupting them, is good. Having good table manners and being conscious about one’s body language, shows awareness of those around you. Politeness communicates respect and shows consideration for other people.

6. Good hygiene!

To get a girlfriend or boyfriend, you must be willing to let go of certain ‘rights.’ Paul made himself a servant for all, in order to win people for Christ. The same attitude pays off when you’re on the look out for a partner.
You have a right to wear whatever clothes you like and smell as you like, but it is not very wise if this stops you from getting anywhere with other people! (example) A daily shower is a good habit, deodorant is a blessing and good dental hygiene, a fresh mint and clean clothes are just wonderful!
Good luck!